For years, I have been trying to get a full-time career as an actor, but I realize I’ve been doing it all wrong. Instead of taking acting classes, studying the classics, and going on several auditions just to be rejected, what I should have done is:

1. Be a hype man for a militant hip-hop group.
2. Completely go the opposite route and ham it up for a celebrity reality show.
3. Spin-off my own show where 20 hoochies and model wannabes fake-fight for my affections.
4. Star in my own sitcom.

Stupid, you say? Well, that’s how Flavor Flav did it. Not only is he about to release a 3rd season of Flavor of Love, the man just got his own sitcom on MyNetworkTV.

So now I know I’ve been at this all wrong. First, I’m gonna see if Three 6 Mafia needs a hype man, then I’m starring on Celebrity Rehab 2, then I’ll pitch “Nerd of Love”, and then it’s off to my own sitcom.

Thank you, Flav, for showing me the light. I can’t wait until the day you receive a lifetime achievement awards at the Emmys.

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