A few weeks ago, Entertainment Weekly wrote an article about how Heroes needs to make some drastic changes to stay alive.

It suggested simple things like trimming the number of characters, getting the show back to its roots, avoiding state storytelling and absurd plot twists, setting an end date, blah blah blah…

A 5-year-old could have made these suggestions.

Heroes, I think you are, have been, and will still be a grand show.

But if you truly want some help, then I will take care of you.  Here is my advice for the NBC series.

Details of my suggestions after the jump. And be sure to vote for your favorite suggestions.

1. Hiro has flashbacks to see how all the Heroes got to where they are now.
And by “flashbacks,” I mean you can now show Season 1 all over again.

2. Crossover with other comic book heroes.
Many heroes have bounced back by crossing over with other Heroes. This show should totally do it! Think about it: Sylar vs. Superman. Peter and Parkman vs. Peter Parker. And my personal favorite, Mohinder & Jughead.

3. Send the Heroes on vacation.
They need a break from all this world saving. So throw them all on the plane for a lovely trip to Sydney, Australia… on Oceanic 815. Then the plane crashes, and they land on a mysterious island which ALSO has magical powers. I think this could work, it totally hasn’t been done before.

4. Pair HRG with Dog the Bounty Hunter.
Face it, getting all those Level 5 Villains back is totally bounty hunting. And I know you’re thinking, what about the whole “One of Us, One of Them” theory. Well, for Dog to have a mullet for that long, he has to have super powers. Just don’t introduce him to the Haitian. Dog might call him something completely different.

5. HEROES BABIES!
Hey, it worked for the Muppets.

6. Show Claire the Cheerleader… NAKED!

7. Show Daphne the Speedster… NAKED!

8. Show Niki AND Jessica… NAKED!

9. Bring Maya back to the show…
Wait, don’t get angry. Let me finish.
…and show her NAKED!!!!
Ah, I knew I’d win you back.

10. Peter travels back to the past to stop Arthur Petrelli from ever meeting his mom.
This could actually work. If Arthur never met Angela, a lot of this would never happen. But the unfortunate side effect could be a teenage Angela falling in love with Peter and referring to him as “Calvin Klein.” That, my friends, was a Back to the Future reference. Hope you enjoyed it.

And finally, Ally McBeal did it. Scrubs did it. That’s So Raven did it. Even Xena: Warrior Princess did it. Not to mention High School did it three times.  I think you know where I’m going here…

11. HEROES: THE MUSICAL!!!

So that’s my advice for you, Heroes. Take it or leave it. But I hope you take it. I’m only trying to help… myself seeing half your cast sing naked on LOST.

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This entry was posted on Sunday, November 16th, 2008 at 8:30 pm and is filed under ENTERTAINMENT. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.