I have to say, for one who likes to joke about celebs, I’ve been pretty lean on Britney Spears.

I didn’t blast her new song (just said, “eh”). I didn’t call her fat at the VMA’s (just said probably wasn’t the best outfit for a mother of two). Actually felt bad for her for losing her kids.

But today’s news story put me over the edge. The story that she immediately was able to get a California Driver’s License.

Britney Spears, who already has been busted on hit and runs, child endangerment in cars, and possibly driving under AND over the influence, gets her driver’s license.

And I can’t.

The reason I know this is because just last week, I tried to get my driver’s license as well as California plates.

It’s true what the TV show Reaper says, the DMV is literally Hell on Earth. Not only did they get mad at me because I did something so evil as refinance my car and not tell them beforehand… oooooh, they made me take off my plates with no tools to do so, and offered me a screwdriver to do it even though I needed pliers.

I even lost the front plate holder on my car because part of it was deadbolted. It’s like a DMV prize. I wonder if all the disgruntled workers will fight over it. I guess Christmas came early this year.

And after I filled out every paper, stood in every line, talked to every English-speaking and non-English-speaking person, I was told right before the place closed, I couldn’t get a license.

Why? Because I didn’t have a birth certificate or passport. Something I’ve NEVER had to show the DMV before in any other state. It didn’t matter that I had my Social Security Card, insurance, titles, tags, and my CURRENT VALID Texas Driver’s License with me, still a no go.

My favorite part was when the lady asked me if I was a foreigner, because if so, I could use a green card. Now I’ve been called many things… nerd, Andrea, Byron Allen-esque… but immigrant isn’t one of them.

So I, with a relatively clean driving record, only 3 accidents my entire life with low insurance rates, and still has his hands at 10 and 2 on the wheel, can’t get a driver’s license with all the paperwork and valid IDs in the world. But Drinky McFederlineEx can get one just like that!

Sorry Britney, but my sympathy for you is no longer available. Unless TMZ.com can get a picture of you sitting at one of those little elementary school desks taking a driver’s test or driving one of those Student Driver Geo’s, I will no longer care about you and your exploits.

I’m shifting my attention back to Lindsay and Paris now. Britney, we’re done.

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This entry was posted on Thursday, October 4th, 2007 at 3:10 am and is filed under ANDRE BLOGS. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.